Pond Hockey

Born and raised in good ol' Saint Paul Minnesota. In the good year of 1993, Minnesota lost a great team. The Minnesota Northstars decided to move down to Texas. I was born without a state hockey team. In 1997, Minnesota formed a new team named the Minnesota Moose. They only lasted one year. But in 2000, Minnesota held a vote for the name of the newest hockey team in Minnesota. The people voted on the Wild.
The very first game was played in the new arena, the Xcel Energy Center. Darby Hendrickson, a former hockey player for Richfield Minnesota and Mr. Hockey in 1991. Darby scored the first goal at the new arena. That was a very proud moment for all Minnesotains. A home grown hockey player scored the first goal for the Minnesota Wild.
Growing up in Minnesota has allowed me to grow as a hockey lover. Minnesota is known as the State of Hockey. That shows the appreciation this state as a whole has for hockey. People love hockey in Minnesota. Every year in March, there is the High School Hockey Tournaments. Schools from all over Minnesota come to compete in it. Schools from way up north such as Roseau or Warroad come play teams from the metro like Edina or South Saint Paul.
Hockey is spread out all over this state. Minnesota has produced the most pro hockey players than any other state. Minnesota has produced some very good hockey players such as Jordan Leopold, Jamie Langenbrunner, Zach Parise, Blake Wheeler, and the Broten Brothers. Not to mention many of the guys on the 1980 Olympic Hockey team were from Minnesota.
I grew up with a outdoor hockey rink just across the street. I would spend every day of winter break there. I would skate from 8 in the morning until they turned the lights off. First when I started skating, I would come home with blisters all over my feet. But skating made me forget about them so I noticed no pain. I would go home for lunch and dinner or my mom would bring it out for me. I developed a love for the game with many of my neighbors. Kids from all over would come and play. I have them to thank for making me the player I am today. Small pick-up games developed my skills necessary to play hockey.
I never played for a team. The cost of hockey is very expensive. Many of my friends played though. So when they came out to my pond, they were sloppy. They were used to playing on ice that is perfectly smooth in arenas that are 30degrees Fahrenheit. So when they came out to play me, they were on rough ice in 10degree weather. Not to mention the wind.
The moral of the story is that I love hockey. I sleep, eat, and breathe hockey. Hockey has taught me the importance of rules, teamwork, adaptability, reward, hard-work, and the love of the game.

Impact of Catholic Schooling

As a kid i was always a skeptic, i questioned santa clause before i had even heard he was fake (sorry if i just ruined that for anyone), and i even caught my mom trying to be the tooth fairy because i waited up all night to see what really happend. I was also enrolled into a new school when we moved in 6th grade, it happend to be a catholic school and for some reason i had already formed an opinion on God, church, and what i regarded as pointless rules. It basically boiled down to a vague belief in God but a hatred for what i considered a waste of an hour spent at church every wednesday. Although i semi-enjoyed religion class due to the rich history it taught, the skeptic in me could not accept the lessons and stories i heard. Part of my skepticism could be due to the fact that my parents had raised me logically, my mom is a nurse and my dad is an engineer; needless to say they never sugar coated things. For example i never heard the stork story for how babys are born, instead i got the birds and the bees speech, my parents never questioned my maturity on issues and always gave me there honest opinions. But the part that mostly impacted my views on religion was the strict code of conduct that was in place at my school, and the fact that the religion teacher also dealt with all disciplinary issues. In my mind i began to associate punishment, closed mindedness, and a strict adherence to the rules with religion in general. I turned from skeptical of the bible stories i heard to outright skeptical of anything my religion teacher said. It is my opinion that my middle school years spent at a catholic school actually lessened my openness to religion and had are a major part of the reason why i am so skeptical of religion today. I would like to take this hypothesis a little further and say that i believe someones relationship with there teacher, and not just school teachers but anyone trying to teach them a lesson, greatly effects how they receive the intended message. And that if that relationship happens to be negative, it can actually taint the persons view of the information they receive. I experienced this myself through my religion teacher and possibly would have been much more receptive if i had had a better image of her during my schooling.

A mothers choice.

I come from a family of immigrants. Both my mother and step-father are immigrants from Sudan, and I was born there and lived there for three years of my life. My birth parents divorced when I was young and my mother and I moved to America where she met my step-dad. They married and had four wonderful kids of their own. That makes five kids including myself in our household but my mother actually has six kids. When we moved to Minnesota my mother was forced to make a decision that has had the biggest impact of my life. She was forced to choose between my older sister and I as to who would go to America with her. She chose me, and my sister stayed in Africa with my dad. There is no question in my mind as to how difficult this decision was for my mother and there is no question in my mind as to how incredibly grateful I am. I have been able to do so many things with my life that my older sister has not been able to do. I go to a wonderful university getting an excellent education and this is all made possible by my wonderful mother and step-father, who have always told me time and time again that there is nothing they want more from me than my success. My parents work hard for what they have and truly have lived "an immigrants life." It's been quite hard on them living this life of ours. But I have so much respect for what they have done for my younger siblings and I. My family, especially my mother, has made a great impact on my life and the person I am today. My "history" whatever it is that it will be made of, will have large and prominent impacts from my family and I am so very grateful.

The Kind of Only Child of a Kind of Single Father.

Basically the following three things effected me in several different ways on several different levels. I have an extreme distaste for people who hate their parents for absolutely no reason whatsoever. That same distaste goes for people who don't appreciate what their parents have done and sacrificed so that their child(ren) could have the life they live. And then there's the pesky abandonment issue.

When I was born, my mom and dad (who weren't married at the time), had me. My mother had two children already, an older boy and older girl whose ages I don't think I've ever known. My mom and dad divorced when I was far too young to remember, and I just grew up without a mother. I only ever remember posing the question to my dad once or twice, but never thought anything of it past that. Other children had two parents, I had one. I lived with it and that was just fine with me. Without delving into the nitty gritty of it all, I never missed her. I never knew her. I still don't know her. When I say that I don't like people who don't like their parents for no rational reason, it somewhat goes doubly for people who don't appreciate their mothers. Having grown up with not so great of a mom myself, I get not liking them for certain reasons (that don't ride on the side of idiocy). What I don't get is when people just don't like them. As if their teenage angst prevents them from realizing that, hey, they still have both of their parents. Maybe they should quit their complaining and appreciate the fact that they have two parents that care for them; which brings me to my next point.

My father worked day and night to near points of exhaustion for me to live as well as I did. It wasn't luxurious or extravagant, but it was home... kind of. No matter how much you work, being a single parent means that you'll probably not be living in a house, and an apartment is out of the question unless you've got a constant sitter. Solution? Have your child live with family friends until you find a stable place to live. Not only did I move around from 'home' to 'home', I had other places that I would stay if my dad worked late into the night. It's actually to the point where I don't remember when I lived where, and can barely put them in chronological order. I'm quite serious about this. Since the people I stayed with were either related to each other, or still very good friends (I guess we're a fairly tight community), it makes it difficult since I saw everyone all the time. Playing onto the earlier point, when people don't realize what their parents (and ancestors) have given up to make sure that they have good lives, so that they don't have to live in poverty-stricken countries where people are literally starving rather than, "Ugh. My life sucks. I don't have enough money for this buffet. Gosh." I'm not on some high horse and I won't snap at you if you say you're starving or something to that effect. I will however secretly despise you if you cruise and don't at least acknowledge what your parents have done. My dad has brought me to work with him before because he couldn't find someone to watch me. I'll put this into perspective: He was one of two people closing a Walmart while simultaneously watching a five-year old. A five-year old that likes to explore large places like Walmart. One that apparently didn't like the concept of sleeping.

One other main important era of my life involved my father getting remarried, to a woman with two girls, as well as bringing over my step-sister from Cambodia, essentially giving me a family; Something I didn't have for the first ten or so years of my life. Long story short, I lived with them, loved them and then another divorce happened about three years later. Oh, I should also mention that at this point, we were living in a house. My own house. If this isn't a generic recipe for abandonment issues, I don't know what is. I guess the term I'm using is a little vague and over-encompassing. While I socialize perfectly fine and am relatively outgoing, I don't get close to people on a personal level. I don't talk about myself (on a personal level). Ever.

While these aren't the biggest parts of my personality, these are major events that shaped me to be who I am today. Most of this was from a class aspect (lower to lower-middle), only child with a single parent, etc) though there were cultural aspects that also came into play. That's a whole different blog post for a whole different day.

Life as I knew it

Yes, this is a photo of the Jollie family having a Jolly time! I love our last name and I like to think we’ve lived up to its meaning! 

I’m the youngest of four children, and I came from some wonderful parents who have been married thirty years! Crazy they have made it this far, but I couldn’t be more proud. My dad grew up in Green Bay, and my mom grew up in Stillwater. They met each other at the University of Minnesota and ended up being apart of a group who started a church called Evergreen Community Church. My father is ambitious and amazing. He truly is a kid at heart, but he knows how to be successful. My dad is the Vice President at a Public Relations firm known as Padilla Spear Beardsley. However, is prestigious position did not come easy. He has told me time and time again that the odds are against you and people will put you down, but always work hard. His never seizing determination and spiritual leaderships is a blessing to our family.

My mother was a nurse before she decided to be a stay at home mom and home school us. I grew up with her as my teacher until I was in 9^th grade. She was the backbone of the house hold and was always ready to cut the next coupon out of the paper. She gave me the love a mother should and was always there when I was having a hard time. Her self discipline inspired me and I admire her for it. 

History of my siblings: I have two older brothers, David (29) and Matt (23) and a older sister named Maria(25).  We were all homeschooled. Many categorize homeschoolers as socially awkward, but that wasn’t the case here. Our parents wanted to raise us with a Christian education in their home but we still had social outlets like sports, choir, church, and friends. We were taught by our mom and some days absolutely sucked, but at the end of the day it was cool to be with family, work at your own pace, and sleep in until 9 a.m! Being so confined to my house, it forced be to become a social butterfly. Anywhere I went I was determined to make a new friend. I started gymnastics at age 3, and by 13 years old I was training 30 hours a week. I’m so thankful for gymnastics because I got see what it was like outside my sheltered bubble.  I traveled the country for competitions and had opportunities to be coached by some of the top instructors in the sport. Being a gymnast, I developed determination like my dad, and self discipline like my mom, mixed in with a little fearlessness which I’m not sure where it came from!

My parents instilled how important having a relationship with God was, and how living according to His word is the most important thing in life. My parents taught me to have self-discipline and to always love your neighbor as yourself. I attended church every Sunday, and I still do now! Being homeschooled allowed me to see how much my parents cared for the safety and well being of my siblings and I. I was very blessed to grow up so close to my family and be able to be a gymnast. Both have shaped who I am today. 

Believing is Key

When I was a young child, my parents put me in many different types of sports such as volleyball, soccer, skating, tennis, and dance. The sport that stuck was dance. I began dancing at the age of three and it has been a huge part of my life ever since. Throughout the years, dancing grew from a fun energy filled form of entertainment to a 7 day a week lifestyle. During this time I continued soccer up to the age of 6 where I then completely devoted my time and life into dance. As I ran the fields during a typical soccer game, it was everything except typical. My parents have many a photo of me prancing and leaping and gallivanting about the field. It was definitely a sight to see. They then decided to place me full time in a sport I loved and never went a second without. My love of dance at the age of six began at The Dance Shoppe. Here I began one year on a recreational team that only danced for fun. The teacher confronted my parents about placing me on the competitive team in order for me to sprout my wings and fly. I was very excited about the transition but I knew it was going to be a challenge. I began preparing and practicing hard up until the day of tryouts. The nerves kicked in and I became somewhat shaky but I knew that I wanted to make the team and I was going to give that tryout everything I had. After waiting anxiously at home for about a week for my letter to come, I opened it to reveal and amazing discovery. I was selected to be a part of their performance team. After dancing about my house and in my yard I gladly accepted and was ready to roll for my first day. I spent years competing in what I loved most and my hard work and dedication paid off. During my final two years with the company I was offered my chance at a solo. These were only given to top performers they thought could handle the challenge. This meant the world to me and I made sure to make my teacher proud.

During my last year at The Dance Shoppe, I began preparing for my high school dance team. My dream goal was to make our varsity team as a freshman. It is a great honor to make the team as a freshman and brought about a lot of nerves and fear. I went to all the required camps and classes and forums about the team and stretched, practiced the routine, and kept active up to the tryouts. I left all I had out on the gym floor in front of my future coaches and captains from the previous year. Luckily, I had an amazing friend who was a captain who helped me calm my nerves for the audition. Having her there in front of me made the experience a million times better knowing I had someone watching me that knew my talent. It only took a few days for the coaches to make their final selections and we were notified by telephone a few nights later. I along with four other close friends were selected as freshmen to be a part of the varsity dance team. This was such an honor and great achievement for me and I will never forget the hard work and memories I created. The hard work and determination helped me to become the dancer I was and gave me a foundation to build off of.

Being a part of my high school dance team made all the difference. It allowed me to make new friends and become one big family that you could turn to with anything. My coaches became my parents, I saw them more than my own anyway, and helped to guide, shape, and encourage all of us to be the best that we could be. I spent three amazing and unforgettable years on the varsity dance team and I will treasure every moment as if it were my last. During these three years we won the state championship two of the years and took second place the other. Working as a team to become one and win we needed to believe in ourselves and believe in our team as a whole. This experience helped to shape my life as I know it today.

Dancing has helped to shape who I am today. Dancing has given me a way to express myself, my feelings, and my emotions in a harmless and artistic way. It has given me a new respect for music which has also become a large part of my life. If I had a bad day at work or at school, I always knew I could count on dance to release my stress and tension and allow it to flow out in a way everyone could enjoy. After a day dancing I always walked out the door feeling clear headed and relaxed, and maybe a little sore. Dancing has helped me to grow up knowing how to build strong relationships, work as a team, and learn to adapt to all situations. Being a part of this team has helped me to grow up responsibly, be independent, being a team player, how to value yourself as a person in respect to all of the stressors of the day, and confidence. I will never forget the memories I have gained for the friends I will keep for forever. Dance has given me a way to express myself and has helped me to gain confidence within myself. As a team, we all gained confidence, determination, drive, and loyalty. Dance has given the community something to watch and take their minds off their stressful days. Dance has given me the chance to build myself up to be the person I am today and has helped me to establish a basis for who I will become in the future.

House Page Program

This is a picture of my best friends in the entire world. Yes, I do mean pretty much all of them and I can name every single person in this picture. These were the kids of the Fall 2009 United States House of Representatives Page class. Being a Page was the event that had the biggest impact in my life, up to this point. As a Page we worked for the United States House of Representatives doing basically whatever they need. For example, bringing papers from the Congressional office buildings near the Capitol to the House floor. We lived in a dorm a few blocks from the Capitol and went to school in the Library of Congress attic, but those things weren't what made this program have such a large impact on my life.

Being forced to live with 63 teenagers that you've never meet before, being no where near your family at 16, and being forced to work as a team with those same teenagers caused a lot of interesting things to happen. I don't think I've ever gotten closer to anyone as quickly as I got close to those kids. Literally, after about two weeks we would all go out together and no one would feel left out or like they didn't belong. It was almost like we bonded so quickly and deeply because if we didn't then we wouldn't have "survived".

The people there were from a wide range of backgrounds, races, places, and personalities, but it was almost as if we all shared something bigger than all of that. The way that we became close friends was based on all of our basic belief that you should truly care about your friends and that no one should feel like they can't come talk to you and spend time with you.

I should mention that I only knew these kids for 6 months, but in that time we became so close that when had to leave we were all distraught because we didn't know how we were going to live without each other. It was coming back from this experience that made me really see what I big impact it had on my life. I came back expecting to find everyone truly caring for each other and being able to talk to and spend time with anyone, but that obviously didn't happen. I haven't found a group like that since. I realized that it was a special group of people that I spent 6 months with, but I also realized that regardless of what others thought, I was going to carry those traits with me, which is a huge change from who I was before that program.

Because I chose to continue having those traits, I lost a lot of people who I had previously been friends with before the program. But I also made a lot of new friends and meet the love of my life because of it. I think that the way those 63 teenagers treated each other and treated me changed me forever and I know that the life I am living would be completely different without it.

On a side note, this program got cancelled almost 3 months ago and I can't image all of the lives that will not be changed for the better because they don't have this amazing opportunity.

Marriage?

When my mother became pregnant with me, she and my dad were not married. In fact, they had just broken up. My dad wanted to get married when he found out but my mom flat out refused. She didn't want to be legally bound to my dad and she largely raised me as a single-mother (even though my dad was, and still is, an integral part of my life).

My dad had been married before to my half-brother's mother, Nancy. They had been together for 10 years until one day my dad "fell out of love" and they divorced. My dad had several different girlfriends when I was younger. Each of his relationships were intense but short, he never got close to marriage again. Even so, my dad never felt a loss. His relationship philosophy revolved around the intense spiritual experience of being connected to another person intimately, he never touted legality to me, instead he told me that what my relationships look like to everyone else shouldn't matter, even the duration shouldn't matter, what really matters is what you learn from the person you are with about yourself.

My mom never got married. Heavily feminist, she was in a committed partnership for 10 years with a man. Essentially, they were like a married couple. He lived with us, he picked me up from school, punished me if I did something bad, helped me with my homework. My mom introduced him as "my partner" to new people she met. They talked about marriage a few times but never got the idea off the ground. My mom always taught me that marriage was essentially just a legal contract for the benefit of the state, for tax purposes, etc. She believed that the wedding ceremony held little symbolic meaning for her and that a 'partnership' emphasized the equality and commitment between lovers as opposed to the obligation of marriage. Love should make you happy, it shouldn't be a chore.

I grew up with a very independent single-mother and a very introspective father, both who never talking about the importance of marriage, only stressing the importance of relationships, whatever form they took. I didn't dream of my perfect wedding dress, or think about rings. I always said I would never get married, when anyone asked. If I did it at all, it would be for tax reasons. I did not romanticize the event. Instead, I saw how financially stressful and emotionally straining it was for my brother and his wife to get married...and how unhappy they were afterwards, somehow thinking that getting married would change their relationship. Everyone I know is divorced, and if they aren't, they are separated.

It only recently started to occur to me how all of these things changed my view so negatively towards the idea of marriage. Now I work at a jewelry store and sell thousands of dollars of wedding jewelry to women who are both stressed AND in love, you can see the excitement in their eyes and the meaning they have put behind their weddings. They can't wait to get married, to make that commitment to each other. And now I am in a committed relationship of my own. I am deeply in love and seriously thinking about marriage and kids and if that is something I could really see for myself at all, or if my mom and dad were right and it's not for me.

Influenced by a Ghost

(This Purple Heart looks exactly like the one my grandfather received from the army)

I have always believed that there has always been influential people in our lives but I also believe that "ghosts" and their stories can also influence us.

My "ghost" is my grandfather who has definitely been a huge influence in my life, despite me barely knowing him. He died of cancer when I was just barely 6 years old, but I still have very fond memories of him playing with me and pushing me in a wheel barrow in a garden. I remember him always being so kind and full of love. After my grandfather died, my father would always tell me stories of how great of a man my grandfather was during his life. According to my father, my grandfather was born of Lutheran immigrants and had to work for everything he had. He was excused from the draft in World War 2 but enlisted anyways because he said “it was the right thing to do” and he also wanted to fight alongside his brother, (unfortunately his brother was killed two weeks before the war ended). Similar to Vladek in Maus, my grandfather was a survivor. Through his skills and a bit of luck he managed to survive the war from D-Day (he fought on Omaha Beach) to the end of the war. After the war, my grandfather was dirt poor but he survived poverty by working three jobs. He married my grandmother and had four sons whom he worked hard for to give them every opportunity he didn’t have.

My grandfather sounds like he is perfect right? Well of course he had his flaws but to me my grandfather was flawless because I don’t have any bad memories about him or have heard anything negative concerning him. Between the stories and the perfect childhood memories, my grandfather has become a fictional "ghost" of how I think people, including me, should be and who I strive to be like. Because of who my grandfather was, or who I imagined him to be, I have led a very different life style. For example because my grandfather was so kind and calm to me as a child and he is so kind in all the stories, it actually makes me feel kind of guilty when I am not so nice or calm. It is kind of a “if he can do it and I am his granddaughter I should be able to do it to” effect. Also, my father told me that when I was born my grandfather was thrilled because he just knew I would go to college. I have heard it over and over again how my grandfather struggled his whole life to put his boys through college while he couldn't go so I shouldn't waste the opportunity, blah, blah blah. The only problem is that this guilt tripping actually works and I do work harder in school because I sort of want to make a ghost proud of me. In fact I want him to be so proud of me that I wrote a speech about patriotism for this VFW contest because I felt that I was obligated too considering my grandfather was a soldier and he would have loved it if I wrote about what he went through. I actually did win and had to make an acceptance speech in front of 1000 middle school kids. This is not something I wouldn't have done if it weren't for my grandfather's influence (I was shy).

Because I am the granddaughter of a surviving soldier who went through tremendous hardship fighting for his country, I have found myself to living almost a grand narrative of what a soldier's decedent should be. One can assume that a granddaughter of an American solider should be patriotic and very sensitive to issues like freedom. Because my grandfather fought for this country I do feel like I have to be (and I am) patriotic. The decedents of American soldiers should also be very thankful for what they have because their ancestors survived when so many others did not. I also do feel this way because I am a soldiers granddaughter. I feel very lucky to have the life that I have today and I almost feel guilty for my existence. Why my grandfather survived the war and his brother did not, I don’t know but my grandfather's survival is why I am here today and it inspires me to take every opportunity I can and enjoy the freedom my grandfather’s sacrifices have gave me.

Families, and Life.

My family has always been the most prominent source of inspiration and encouragement in my life. I am extremely fortunate and thankful for the family that I have. In this post, I'll talk a little bit about each member of my family and how they've impacted me, and then some key life-events that have changed my outlook on life. (The picture above shows my mom, me, my girlfriend Andrea, my sister, and my dad.)

Troy (dad) - My dad has always been one of my heros. My parents are both Christians, and I grew up in a Christian home going to church every week. My dad played bass in the worship band, which I always thought was awesome growing up. He is incredibly smart, and always seemed to be able to help me with stuff. He taught me nearly everything I know. He is also incredibly goofy and is always smiling and joking around.

As I grew up, he chose to leave his steady job as an electrical engineer in order to serve as a "missionary" of sorts for The Navigators. That was a big change for our family, and after a few years he had to make the hard decision to find another "real" job in order to provide for our family. Watching him struggle through these transitions taught me a lot about conflict and decision making.

Lori (mom) - My mom has always been there to listen to me and comfort me. Growing up she stayed home with me and my sister. Even when we were old enough to go to Elementary school, she stayed home and took care of the house. Once my sister and I got to middle school, she decided to homeschool us for a few years. This was a huge change for our household, and I learned a lot from watching her reactions to the situation. 

Alyssa (sister) - My sister has always been different than me in many ways. When we were real young, we were best friends. As we grew up, however, she became the more social and "popular" one at school, and I had my few friends. I did better in school than she did, and she always seemed to hate that. The differences between us and the way we interacted with my parents taught me more than any textbook ever could about people.

Life - Life is never as easy as we expect it to be. As I already said, my family is a Christian family, and religion has always had a place in my life and has impacted my opinions. My dad's job changes and financial struggles have taught me tons about responsibility and decision making. My mom's decision to homeschool us for a few years also taught me about family and education, and making a family "work." All of these life changes have impacted who I am and the opinions I have.

The biggest life change that I experienced was my dad's decision to take a job in Colorado Springs the summer before my senior year of high school. I had lived in the same house my entire life up to that point. Moving completely flipped my world upside down and caused me to question everything - my parents, God, myself - everything. It was an incredibly difficult time in my life, but it gave me an entirely new perspective on life. It really was good for me in the end, and I learned more from that experience about myself than at any other point in my life. 


There are countless other factors that affected my life and changed my perspective on life, but this post is already too long as-is. As you can see, my family has played an integral part in my "story" and forming my opinions and outlook on life. I could go into more details about all of these things, but for brevity's sake I will leave it for a different time.

Rugby: Confidence on and off the field

I was always a bit aggressive as an adolescent growing up, I played a lot of sports but was always searching for something new and exciting. In my sophomore year of high school I was researching colleges and came across the sport of rugby. I had always planned on joining a team in college but by my junior year of high school I was determined to join a team right then and there. My mother and I started looking for teams in the area but anything that had once existed was now deteriorated. Sure, there were teams, but none within a 30 mile radius of my school. I did, however, find a boys team for high schools within 2 miles of my house. I contacted the coach but he said it was only for boy and that the girls team had gone under. I was talking to my assistant band director who played rugby in high school and he thought we should just start a team here. I thought it was far-fetched (we both did) but was also very jazzed at the thought of it all coming together. I started recruiting and advertising immediately: hanging up fliers in 8 schools, asking all of my friends to join (along with their friends), I even asked people I had never met before and contacting athletic directors in very high school that was within 20 miles of mine. I went to my high school's athletic director with a list of 35 girls that wanted to play and a coach, but he said the school could not help out. So I contacted the nearby boy's team coach again, he thought it might be a good idea to establish a girl's team to partner them. He registered us and found us another coach (rugby teams field up to 23 people so multiple coaches are typical). We held a meeting and got 35 girls and their parents to attend! With t he help of my mom, the boy's team coach and my band director, we got a practice field, a parent board, 3 coaches, 25 players, and equipment. I was so amazed that I even made a team to begin with! But what was to come would be more amazing.

None of us knew a thing about rugby beforehand, funny how I did all this work but didn't even bother to question whether I would enjoy the sport or not. When we played our first game we were running around clueless like a bunch of chickens with our heads cut off, but by some miracle we managed to win. Throughout the season we had some wins and some losses and ended up ranked 5th entering the playoffs, meaning we would be playing as the underdogs for a place at state. We won our playoff game, then had to beat a division one which dropped down (since we were new we entered the season as a division two team). We managed to win the first game of the state tournament which meant we were now in the final. The weather was terrible: windy, cold, and rainy, and not to mention there was scheduling confusion and we had zero time to warm up. But amazingly we pulled through with a win. Our team was ecstatic with disbelief. I was so proud that we came from nothing to champions.

Other than the rugby win, throughout the season I noticed girls gain confidence in life outside of rugby. The sport of rugby has a way of empowering you, when you learn to make a good tackle and bring someone down you then walk off feeling unstoppable. These great girls that barely knew each other in the beginning worked together for a state championship, they became very close and some of them are my best friends to this day. I have continued with rugby and it has brought much success and many people into my life. Rugby is a community and a window for opportunities, which has shaped who I am today. It gives you confidence, yet it humbles you because you are always learning the rules. Rugby can be a stress reliever but also an adrenaline rush beyond anything you can imagine. Needless to say, the sport, community and lifestyle of rugby has made me a responsible, hard working person and given me role models to follow.

Is it really unbiased?

The education system is supposed to be an unbiased institution in which it's purpose is to teach kids facts and teach them how to think critically, become meticulous, and form work ethics. But does it do more than that?

In my experience this has not always been the case. In fact I would argue that the schools and the teachers that were apart of the schools had the largest impact on my opinions and how I form my opinions. From an early age we were thrust into an environment full of our peers and were taught to listen to every word that the instructor said, analyze it, interpret it, and learn from it. Teachers were the sole authority in a classroom full of all of my peers always the pinnacle of attention for 8 hours a day, 5 days a week, 9 months a year. We were trained to take in everything they say as fact because we are open minded. With all of that attention it's kind of hard to imagine that at some point those teachers weren't biased or didn't express their own opinions and through those biases some of my own opinions were formed.

During my time at Park High School one of the biggest emphasis of all of the teachers was "preparing" us for college. With that came stories that they would tell us of when they were in college or things that we should expect in college. At that time since I obviously was not in college or had experience college, I trusted everything that they said about it. It was as if because I had no personal experience I couldn't filter their opinions about college and consequently took their opinions and used them as my own.

These opinions that I formed about what college should be like from my teachers were not permanent. They have been altered as I have experienced college. I am able to form new opinions by filtering the previous opinions I had in high school with what I had actually experienced. Thus discrediting some previous opinions I had and enforcing others making the opinions I have about college unique to someone else's opinions of college.

Big City Bound

When I was 6 months old, I was adopted from South Korea by my parents who reside in the United States. We live in a small town in Southern Minnesota. I am constantly complaining that my hometown is small and that there is "nothing to do." After graduating high school, I knew I wasn't going to attend a small school is a small college town. For me it was big school, bigger city.

I was born in Seoul, South Korea in one of the largest hospitals there. I was born in one of the largest cities in the world. I was born in a highly populated area. I believe I was meant to live in a large city. I love Minneapolis. There is so much to do, so much to see, and so much to experience.

In a big city I feel like I belong. There are thousands of people around me, all diverse. I don't stick out and everyone doesn't know my story. I'm not "the adopted girl" anymore. I don't feel alone because there is a sea of people walking right beside me.

In the summer of 2008, my parents blessed me with the opportunity to visit South Korea. Thinking I was going to fit in there, I didn't. I stuck out more than I did back home in the United States. The Korean people knew I wasn't from there. I didn't speak their language. I didn't dress like them. My looks weren't even the same. From then on, I constantly thought, I don't fit in anywhere. I questioned and thought a lot about what would have happened if I didn't get adopted. Would I still have the same opportunities? Would I have been bounced from foster care to foster care? Would my birth parents be able to care for me? Would I have more chances if I stayed in South Korea? What would I be like? While I'll never know my "other life," I've come to happy medium where I would love to know, but I'm completely satisfied with how my life is.

Being adopted, visiting Seoul, and living in Minneapolis has definitely had a large impact on my life. Because my biological parents put me up for adoption, I've had abandonment issues and I'm always worried to commit to something because I don't want to get disappointed if it falls though. I've had to deal with those emotions inside for all my life. Although confused and angry that my birth parents did give me up, I am happy. Without that decision, I would not have met my amazing family, awesome friends, or lived the privileged life I have lived so far. By visiting Korea, I have realized that I am my own self and I am unique. I'm like no one else. And I'm perfectly fine with that.

A Chicago Sports Fan in Wisconsin?

I am a huge Chicago sports fan! I'm all about everything Bears, Cubs, Bulls, and Blackhawks, but the problem is is that I was born and raised in Racine Wisconsin. Racine is very close to the Illinois border, but it is still in a state that bleeds green and gold. People always ask me why I am a Bears fan or a Cubs fan if I live in Wisconsin. I do have a good reason, both my parents were born and raised in Chicago, so growing up there was no packer gear or merchandise allowed in the house. Growing up watching the Bears on Sunday with my dad was always a highlight of the week. Even a few weeks ago when my parents came up to visit, my dad and I sat in my apartment and watched the game and kicked back a few brewskis. Growing up a Bears fan in Wisconsin is not for the faint of heart, especially if you are my age and Brett Favre started his career a week or so before I was born. I even missed the 80's when the bears were good. All in all, growing up with that constant battle between friends really shaped who I am today. It helped me to let comments slide right off of me as well as help me think of comebacks quickly. It has also taught me not to worry about being the nail that sticks out. It has taught me that it's okay to not follow the pack.

I kind of met my brother at age 16

In terms of memories, I'd like to think I've got a collection of some good ones. Nothing especially trying or challenging or painful, but many unique experiences that have certainly shaped me and the way I think.

I've posted a picture of my older brother, who is four years my elder. I can't say we've always been close or that we even are very close now. Growing up, I barely remember interacting with him even though our bedrooms shared a wall and we did thousands of family things. We kind of just stayed out of each others' way. No arguing or wrestling or sharing friends or toys or food. Even now, he's getting his MBA in Boston, and we speak once per month, or less. We trade emails sometimes but they're essentially a list of status updates with some congratulatory remarks.

But seven years ago when he entered college, I was 16 and we began sharing many important interests, which we seemed to develop independently. Namely, we both love to meet new people and experience new things. We recognized that we love to travel and have huge passion for individual success. The picture shown is the two of us on New Years Eve in Rome, Italy. He was visiting me after my semester abroad, and we were out on the town having a beer (or twelve). The next many pictures in the facebook album of this night are the two of us laughing, cheering and running around with many other people, Italians and other Americans, all of whom we had met minutes before. We spoke little to no Italian, but were somehow having the time of our lives in a strange place with strange people.

We both were raised in a good suburb with great parents who have good jobs and we lived totally comfortably. But no one ever demonstrated a desire to obtain anything more or different. Somehow we developed drive and passion to find reward, often through risks. This shocks our parents at first, but usually results in success beyond that which we witnessed growing up (educationally, fiscally, etc).

The point being, I define my life with key goals to gain exposure and experiences with diverse people and places. My brother has been a support system for me in these goals, and I to him as we pursue parallel opportunities in completely separate and diverging lives. I wonder how we grow to be so similar as time and distance increases between us. I certainly recognize that I see his successes and crave my own in my different life, and I know that life resources (access to funding, mobility and emotional support) aid our pursuits.

Where do my opinions come from?

When people ask me who the biggest influence is in my life, my answer is always: my dad. I feel like I'm a good mix of both of my parents and their personalities but the most visible characteristics, views, and opinions I have is because of my dad.

My dad wears many hats. I'm not specifically referring to the brown cap he's wearing in the picture but instead what I mean is that there are many components that create his identity. Finding a picture to represent who my dad is, was hard. Scrolling though the pictures I saw my dad and my mom, my dad and my family, my dad rallying against deportations, and him helping organize the North Side Tornado clean up. There are pictures of him preaching, of him in Honduras, him with his white, asian, black, and latino brothers and sisters. How can I even begin summarize who he is and the effect he has had in my life?

I found that this picture shows a pretty good handful of his qualities in which I picked up on. To start with the microphone he holds represents how my dad is a leader. I learned, from him, how to take action, to be bold and to speak what's on my heart. Through his involvement with various church organizations and social justice movements, my eyes have been opened to the particular issues they face and awareness they raise. His shirt is from a monthly event organized by the non-profit he works for. From the name, Love Minneapolis, you can get the gist of what it's about (loving MPLS). Once again, through this my eyes have been opened to the injustice that is so prevalent in the city but he has also taught me how sometimes the solution lies in simply loving your neighbor.

I want to mention his hat as well; my dad likes wearing them even though some of the ones that he wears makes him look, as my friends put it, "gangster". Living in North Minneapolis we know gangsters and ex-gangsters. Living in "the hood" where my parents raised me has made me aware of people, their personalities, living conditions, and that not everyone has it off is as well as my priviate-school-suburban-friends.

The last thing I wanted to point out in this picture is the cross necklace my dad displays daily. As I mentioned before, one of the "hats" my dad wears is being a preacher. Being raised in a christian home, I have always had the church and godly influences in my life. The faith I have is no longer my parent's but is now personally mine. This the essence of how I see the world and what makes and shapes my opinions.

Although I haven't figured out a major and I'm still deciding on what to do with the rest of my life, my past experiences have shaped me into the person I am today and my dad is the person who has been most influential in the way I see the world.

Secret War Survivors

NOTE: My Fater is NOT in this picture. It has been pulled from Google Images. It just resembles and is very close to what the Hmong soldiers look like in the war. (No gears and protections. Just Weapons.)

During the Secret war, the Hmong people helped US soldiers recover and aid pilots that were shot down by the Vietcong in Vietnam. What many people don't understand about the Hmong people is that they are survivors of a secret war and had been supportive to the US army behind enemy zones. This is an important part of history for Hmong people, my parents, and mine as well. My father served in the army when he was around my age (19) at no choice and was one of many Hmong comrades that helped serve alongside the US. After loosing the Secret War, Hmong people were granted access to the United States of America for their honorable help. My history is sort of what Art Spiegelman illustrates in his graphic novel Maus. My parents' history was very similar to Spiegelman's father's. Both our parent's history had to do with survival, dealing with stressful situations, making decisions and sacrifices that will impact their futures and their children's future.

My life is greatly influenced with my parent's decision. I think that a lot of their survival had to do with luck and the decisions that they chose. If it weren't for my parent's survival, I probably wouldn't be here today to tell the story of what makes me me. I am the first generation of a surviving generation from the Secret War. What influences me and my own decision making are the struggles and sacrifices my parents made to come to the US. My parents sacrificed their life through fighting for their freedom, giving up their land, and loosing some of their siblings behind the war. My presence was possible because of my parents decision. If it weren't for them, would I still be here today in the US or still in Laos? I am culturally influenced and historically shaped through what my parents struggle and go through. My thoughts and what I plan to do with my life is dependent on my past and what my parents have gone through for my generation and siblings.

Posting Assignment #5 (due Sunday 10/23, 11:59 P.M.; comment by 11:59 Monday, 10/24: Make History

Early in our work, we listened to Gang of Four ask 'Why theory?'  They sing 'We've all got opinions.  Where do they come from?'  This project asks us to explore where opinions come from—actually our whole views of the world—by examining bits of our personal and public histories.  Where, exactly DID some of our 'opinions' come from?

Robin does his homework: Mom put this picture in my babybook on the page for 'Baby's Fourth Birthday.' Apparently I didn't have a good time because I was worried that the other kids' balloons would break and they wouldn't have a good time.  From the left: Guy Huntley, Phillip Moreland, Donny Peterson, and me (what was Mom thinking with the flowered matching outfit?).  Guy became an insurance salesman. Phillip (the goofy looking one) became a Catholic priest.  Donny's father was a coal miner, and Donny followed him into the mines.  He died there in an explosion (Consolidated Coal) at 52. And me—well, you know me.  Somehow—even at four—we all knew that Donny was a 'working class kid' (though we didn't have the words for it).  The other three of us were supposed to do better in school (and we did). It's almost a GRAND NARRATIVE of what a good boy does with his life.  But I always thought Donny was smarter than the other two.  He knew how to wire up the electric trains.  He could track animals.  He was a lot more fun.  Maybe biology matters (I still worry about whether the other kids will have a good time). But class really matters. Class determined a lot of my history, and if I were writing this blogpost, I'd take that topic, and use this baby book and picture as my 'historical archive.'

Write a tiny mini-history in which you show how particular events, people, forces, spaces, objects and so on have contributed to your 'story' of who you are.  Remember that we're suspicious of Grand Narratives, and that we know that every story will be shot through with ideology—can't not be. In fact, it' this critical look at the 'stories' that ordered our lives that can be the most interesting part of this project. Got images?  Put 'em in. Find things that mattered (songs, movies, soccer, Girl Scouts, school, 4H)? Talk about it. Is it important who you (the writer) are, too?  Talk about that.  Need models?  Well, that's tough, because all of us are so different and so are our stories.  But no stupid Yearbook-ish generalities.  No pious 'moral lessons learned.'  Think Spiegelman—right, you maybe can't draw like him, but we can all try to THINK like him….

Look hard, talk with your family and friends, share your ideas with your group.  Show us how a life took shape, and how you shape the story.

Does this one need 'theory'?  Not so much, but it really does need to do our kind of work: to show us how big historical operations play out in our very intimate lives.

Pamela Anderson and PETA--Sarah via Robin

While searching for images to discuss for this blog post, I came across this disturbing, offensive, and demeaning image of Pamela Anderson.  This image clearly portrays women as a “piece of meat”.  PETA teamed up with Pamela Anderson to show how women are being portrayed and realistically being viewed as by many men.  In many cultures, women are viewed as second class and it has evolved into men taking advantage of women like a piece of steak.  Pamela Anderson is known in our culture as being an object of sex which she clearly portrays in this image.  She is wearing a skimpy bikini and is posed in a “sexy” position.  Her hair and makeup are perfectly done which helps to show how women must be appealing to men or they won’t be “accepted”.  While she sits in a famous sex pose, her body is divided as that of a cow or pig, defining each area as it were to be sold as meat.  From this picture, nothing matters except the “cut” of meat.  Personality, smarts, and integrity are not listed among the accounted for attributes.  This image also helps to show that the opinions of society have shaped the classifications throughout our culture.  Due to the classification system of women in society, it provides an easy depiction of this photo by the general population. 

                  Peta’s main goal is to decrease animal abuse and to make it aware to the public of animal neglect.  This issue now extends into how women are treated within society.  Animals are not the only creatures being viewed as meat but women are as well and it is time for change.  Women are just as much human and males and should obtain equality in society.  Women are many a times viewed as objects of sex and “meat” in advertisements to catch the attention of many males.  While this may help the object being advertised sell, but has a negative effect on women.  Many women think that if they do not contain the “perfect” body that they will not be accepted by men and therefore won’t be accepted by society.

                  I believe that this image is not only influenced by society, but by politics and gender rankings.  Women are many times ranked lower than men and many people believe this system.  Many men think that they are superior to women and they should be the ones in the household to cook, clean, and tend to the children.  The time has come for our corrupt society to change its views and make women equal in dominance.

Can White People Remember Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. Too??

http://www.twincities.com/ci_19127879

In a recent article found on the Saint Paul Pioneer Press website, there was a lengthy article was written covering the MLK memorial being unveiled in Washington DC. The article was very beautiful and was located on the home page of the website. President Obama and his family attended, as did hundreds or thousands of other Americans. There is a slide show of about 12 photos showing somber remembering faces showing respect and enjoying the community being felt around the memorial. However, the only faces that are shown in any of the photos are black faces.

Undoubtedly, there were white Americans present at the memorial, as well as representations of countless other races. Tens of people are showcased in the photographs shown. Thus, it is very unbalanced to represent only black people in the photos. Simply math should ensure that other "colors" of people be depicted.

This must have been an intentional choice of the photo editor of the Pioneer Press. I would wager that the photographer took racially diverse photographs. It may have been an attempt to show the black community coming together in a powerful way, but to me it claims that Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. was a hero only for the African Americans. It certainly presents continuity between the photos, but it is a little questionable that the photos are not diverse when celebrating a man who promoted diversity.

As a side note, on the webpage showing this article, there are several advertisements which ALSO happen to portray black models.

SEX sells

We now live in an era where the couple is loosely defined. We have intercial couples, straight couples, and gay/lesbian couples. Kids are being exposed to many different types of media on a daily basis. Many of societies 'norms' are being challenged. 50 years ago, America was working to end racial discrimination. In the 70's, people began experimenting with sex. In today's world, GLBT's are fighting for equal marriage rights. Sex is beginning to become an average image for an ad. Since the 1920's, ads have been slowing taking of the clothing and using stronger language.



This ad from the 1920's shows a pretty young woman looking into the mirror at her beautiful and shiny hair. The woman is wearing a simple black nightgown that covers the majority of her body. The ad simply states "Cleanses and beautifies the hair" - Cuticura.



This ad is much more recent than the last. The woman is staring very sexually at the camera with only a black bra on. Over her image is a message stating "I can't cook. Who cares?" - Wonderbra. This image is much more seductive than the last. Although both images could be thought of as seductive to that era.

The 'norms' for ads is changing. People are becoming used to the use of sex as a way to sell products. Models for ads are beginning to show their genitals for the good of the product. Being raised in a Catholic household, seeing images like these were frowned upon. Mom would tell me to pray for the models of those pictures. But yet the ad agencies haven't changed their game plan. They are still using sex. They will continue using sex. But where will the people finally draw the line?

Obvious Racism

http://harryallen.info/wp-content/uploads/2008/03/lebron_as_brute2.jpg

In this image it compares an old army add showing a large ape taking a white women in his arms clearly against her will acompanied by the excerpt "Stop This Brute". The Lebron James image is very similiar except the ape is replaced with Lebron and there is no excerpt, however the images are strikingly similiar even tho they are at least 50 years apart.
The images obviously promote the idea of the dangerouse, sex crazed black male which was engrained in our society since the times of slavery. They also make no attempt to hide the comparison of Lebron to an ape, which is also a historicaly grounded racial slur. The images argue that black is wild, uncivilized, possibly even dangerouse, while arguing the inocence of white women and that they are in need of protection. In essence the image is not only arguing a certain view of race but also a view of gender; it argues taht women are weak and need the protection of society.
When i saw this image i was stunned at first because of how similiar the two images were. I was completely suprised that they would use a racially and gender motivated image like this for the cover of a magazine, after all i thought we had moved away from such public displays of racism before i was born.
Examining the politics of representation working within this image it is not hard to see the mesage. First, it is reinforcing the historical stereotypes that have plagued black men since the time of slavery. It is simutaneosly labeling black men as wild/uncivilized which implys the idea of the normal white body. And finally it solidifies the notion that women are helpless and in need of pertection.